A couple of weekends ago I was watching this old Tamil Movie where the story revolved around a divorced couple and their son was being raised by the mother and the ways the father took to get back to his wife.Bhagyaraj was the hero and Sarita played his wife.The movie displayed very minute details of the high expectations which any married couple will have and how deeply they loved each other .They really did not think it was an expectation or a duty but it was part of their life to be transparent to each other be it how big or small things were.As every married life will have its own ups and downs sorrow enters their life through Sarita's friend who is a young widow and Sarita pleads her husband to help the widow get her husband's insurance money.With a lot of reluctance Bhagyaraj obliges to help her to please his extremely broadminded wife..he goes to an extent to please his wife's friend in every possible way which leads Sarita and Bhayaraj to part ways while Sarita is pregnant.
The fact I did not like in this movie is when Bhagaraja tried all possible means to get back to his wife the only reason which she quotes for not going back to him is that he cheated on her but every other friend ,relative of Sarita convince her taking examples of other men who were bigger cheats and they
also request her to appreciate the fact that her husband confessed his misdeed to her which he could have hid forever.Well my question is..if Sarita had committed one such mistake and had asked for an apology would her husband accept her ?I would have appreciated a friend who guides her saying living a life as a single mother is better than to live as a cheat's wife..you never know when he will cheat on you again..
Secondly if there were worse men in the world so be it , a husband who cheats his wife is an addition to that list but no better than the whole lot.The worst scene in the movie which I hated the most is the climax where Bhagyaraj pretends to marry another woman and lets Sarita plead and cry like she had committed a crime and asking for forgiveness.To top it up she resorts to killing herself and her poor son and finally realises that her husband was playing a prank on her...The moral was yes we should learn to forgive and forget and move on in life..may be acceptable to some extent but the concept is very subjective.The above mentioned movie was extreme where the Chasity of one is questionable but what about the other incidents which people do behind each others back.
I understand that everyone needs their own space to and it should be respected.But if you think your space is doing things behind each other back and not feeling guilty about it then expect the same from the other person too.
If you expect your wife to keep you updated about her whereabouts every second you jolly well live up to it before expecting so.You cannot have her being transparent to you and you hid things from her and say well I helped people out of goodwill and be happy that Im atleast letting you know ..Above all SORRY is word we can tolerate for petty things but not for instances where you do things behind each others back..
If you are willing to do a task and if your spouse's opinion for that matter is not of great importance to you then learn not to expect the same from the other person as well.I personally feel that women do try their best to move on but if such mistakes are done repeatedly I think we just lose hope and either learn to part ways or live like a vegetable so that your decision doesnt affect your kids future and in bargain men continue to take advantage of your emotions and get back in action...
Sunday, December 23, 2012
Thursday, May 5, 2011
A Privileged Pain
April 13th 2011 9:51am..a new beginning..a new meaning to our life..our new form to our love...
Little did we expect that the day I completed my 36th week I would be asked to get admitted in the hospital quoting the reason that I had some infection which made the environment not so hostile for the growing foetus.Taken aback we called up
my parents and parents-in-laws informed them and got admitted post 12.00am as my dad is always finicky about Tuesdays.The doctor had instructed her team to help me undergo some fetal heart rate monitoring tests and to induce pain hoping for
the contractions to begin early so that I could deliver the next day without much delay. Contractions were much of an unexplained pain which I had to bear all night just to realize the next day that I had developed an allergy to the gel being used .After a couple of minutes decision was taken by the doctors to delivery my baby in C section and not induce pain for the next stage. My husband and I were asked to sign some papers while the nurses were busy getting me ready for the surgery while I was still wondering if all of this was a dream and if I could catch some sleep before the I got operated as I had not slept even a wink due to the contractions previous night. I tried my best to be as brave as possible and not to shed tears which would make my mom feel all the more weak but unfortunately I could not control myself as I was being put onto the stretcher and when saw my most loved ones around me. Though my husband was allowed inside the operation theater I still was so apprehensive about the whole ordeal that I just wanted it to get over as early as possible.As I was moved into the operation theater I noticed several male and female nurses all set and prepared to handle my delivery. My eyes kept wandering searching for my husband who was to be clad in the same uniform as that of the doctors and nurses present in the Operation Theater. The anesthesiologist realized my anxiety and informed me that my husband would be let in once I’m done with the prescribed dosage of the an anesthesia. I have heard several stories about how C sections are done but now when it was my turn I felt like I was only person in this world who is undergoing all this. The bed were I laid was raised and I was asked to sit with my legs resting on a chair, my eyes still hunting for my husband finally found him outside the glass door looking at me helplessly while the anesthesiologist drew some graphs on my back and finally injected the most miraculous drug into me.It was a terrible feeling that ran up and down my spine like a thousand sharp finger nails being rubbed against a blackboard. I was then asked to lie down and to raise my feet as and when requested by the anesthesiologist..Everytime he asked me to raise my feet I did so without much ado leaving me with a fear that I might undergo the same problem as that of my mother who was given very mild dosage of anesthesia during her C section which made her conscious during the middle of the surgery leading her to feel the pain of her uterus being cut open.Finally at one point of time I realized my lower body was totally numb and that I had totally no sensation. My husband was finally allowed inside who sat right beside my head holding my hands which was tied to monitor my heart rate and the other for some drips. A curtain was placed right in front of my neck as my gynecologist had begun to show the best of her skills. Though I could not see anything was what was happening I could kind of sense it from the way my husband would hold my hand .Everytime he noticed a gush of blood or a deeper cut being made on me he would hold my hand firmer and pat me on my head. At one point of time I felt like my upper body was being pushed towards my jaw and my entire body was jerked badly from left to right several times. In a few seconds from then outcame an outburst of loud cry of our new bundle of joy. I could not control my tears of happiness which flew down my eyes profusely which my husband kept wiping with one hand while his other hand was busy wiping his. I was so thrilled and excited at the biggest wonder of life which was in me for 36 weeks and was finally out as a new form to ourlove.I felt so proud so excited so overwhelmed to have become a mother and felt so privileged to be a Woman. As I was curious to know if it was a boy or a girl baby my husband was excited about the baby having lots of hair, finally the doctor came over to me and said congrats its a male baby..I was right as I was sure that it was a boy baby from my 5th month scan..While I was feeling drowsy my husband was asked to leave the operation theater and I was being cleaned and moved into the post operation ward.Finally when I was in my conscious I was in LRDP suite where I was surrounded with all my relatives congratulating me and my husband.Our son was being kept in the NICU for that entire day since he was 20+ days premature and underweight and my husband was the only person who was allowed to see him. Surprising even after the delivery I had contractions which added to the pain of the postpartum bleeding, surgery and the injection given on my spine. The only thing that alleviated my pain was the pictures and the videos of our baby taken by my husband everytime he went into see him at the NICU.
The next day as I walked to the NICU to nurse my baby I felt like I had just learnt how to walk and I walked like I was walking the first time. I had terrible pain around the area where the surgery was done and in addition to it felt so weak
as I was on a complete liquid diet the previous day and night.Finally when I saw our son and when I nursed him I felt it was worth all the pain that I had undergone during conception ,pre and post delivery.I was discharged from the hospital on
the 4th day and we carried our new bundle of joy to my parents-in laws place first and then came to my parents home.
All through my married life I always considered my husband to my first child,my best friend,my guide,my role model...but this entire ordeal of pregnancy,labour,surgery,delivery,post partum I realized that my husband is also my mother.The kind of help, support and deeds he did was something that only a mother would willing do for her child.
I feel so good to be a mother and to have 2 mothers in my life :)
Little did we expect that the day I completed my 36th week I would be asked to get admitted in the hospital quoting the reason that I had some infection which made the environment not so hostile for the growing foetus.Taken aback we called up
my parents and parents-in-laws informed them and got admitted post 12.00am as my dad is always finicky about Tuesdays.The doctor had instructed her team to help me undergo some fetal heart rate monitoring tests and to induce pain hoping for
the contractions to begin early so that I could deliver the next day without much delay. Contractions were much of an unexplained pain which I had to bear all night just to realize the next day that I had developed an allergy to the gel being used .After a couple of minutes decision was taken by the doctors to delivery my baby in C section and not induce pain for the next stage. My husband and I were asked to sign some papers while the nurses were busy getting me ready for the surgery while I was still wondering if all of this was a dream and if I could catch some sleep before the I got operated as I had not slept even a wink due to the contractions previous night. I tried my best to be as brave as possible and not to shed tears which would make my mom feel all the more weak but unfortunately I could not control myself as I was being put onto the stretcher and when saw my most loved ones around me. Though my husband was allowed inside the operation theater I still was so apprehensive about the whole ordeal that I just wanted it to get over as early as possible.As I was moved into the operation theater I noticed several male and female nurses all set and prepared to handle my delivery. My eyes kept wandering searching for my husband who was to be clad in the same uniform as that of the doctors and nurses present in the Operation Theater. The anesthesiologist realized my anxiety and informed me that my husband would be let in once I’m done with the prescribed dosage of the an anesthesia. I have heard several stories about how C sections are done but now when it was my turn I felt like I was only person in this world who is undergoing all this. The bed were I laid was raised and I was asked to sit with my legs resting on a chair, my eyes still hunting for my husband finally found him outside the glass door looking at me helplessly while the anesthesiologist drew some graphs on my back and finally injected the most miraculous drug into me.It was a terrible feeling that ran up and down my spine like a thousand sharp finger nails being rubbed against a blackboard. I was then asked to lie down and to raise my feet as and when requested by the anesthesiologist..Everytime he asked me to raise my feet I did so without much ado leaving me with a fear that I might undergo the same problem as that of my mother who was given very mild dosage of anesthesia during her C section which made her conscious during the middle of the surgery leading her to feel the pain of her uterus being cut open.Finally at one point of time I realized my lower body was totally numb and that I had totally no sensation. My husband was finally allowed inside who sat right beside my head holding my hands which was tied to monitor my heart rate and the other for some drips. A curtain was placed right in front of my neck as my gynecologist had begun to show the best of her skills. Though I could not see anything was what was happening I could kind of sense it from the way my husband would hold my hand .Everytime he noticed a gush of blood or a deeper cut being made on me he would hold my hand firmer and pat me on my head. At one point of time I felt like my upper body was being pushed towards my jaw and my entire body was jerked badly from left to right several times. In a few seconds from then outcame an outburst of loud cry of our new bundle of joy. I could not control my tears of happiness which flew down my eyes profusely which my husband kept wiping with one hand while his other hand was busy wiping his. I was so thrilled and excited at the biggest wonder of life which was in me for 36 weeks and was finally out as a new form to ourlove.I felt so proud so excited so overwhelmed to have become a mother and felt so privileged to be a Woman. As I was curious to know if it was a boy or a girl baby my husband was excited about the baby having lots of hair, finally the doctor came over to me and said congrats its a male baby..I was right as I was sure that it was a boy baby from my 5th month scan..While I was feeling drowsy my husband was asked to leave the operation theater and I was being cleaned and moved into the post operation ward.Finally when I was in my conscious I was in LRDP suite where I was surrounded with all my relatives congratulating me and my husband.Our son was being kept in the NICU for that entire day since he was 20+ days premature and underweight and my husband was the only person who was allowed to see him. Surprising even after the delivery I had contractions which added to the pain of the postpartum bleeding, surgery and the injection given on my spine. The only thing that alleviated my pain was the pictures and the videos of our baby taken by my husband everytime he went into see him at the NICU.
The next day as I walked to the NICU to nurse my baby I felt like I had just learnt how to walk and I walked like I was walking the first time. I had terrible pain around the area where the surgery was done and in addition to it felt so weak
as I was on a complete liquid diet the previous day and night.Finally when I saw our son and when I nursed him I felt it was worth all the pain that I had undergone during conception ,pre and post delivery.I was discharged from the hospital on
the 4th day and we carried our new bundle of joy to my parents-in laws place first and then came to my parents home.
All through my married life I always considered my husband to my first child,my best friend,my guide,my role model...but this entire ordeal of pregnancy,labour,surgery,delivery,post partum I realized that my husband is also my mother.The kind of help, support and deeds he did was something that only a mother would willing do for her child.
I feel so good to be a mother and to have 2 mothers in my life :)
Friday, November 12, 2010
Im addicted to you dont you know that your toxic!!
Yes Im Addicted..this addiction started way back in Jan 2007 and it has been growing in leaps and bounds since then..I know everyone wants to get out their addictions but this is something I would want to thrive inside me and enjoy for the rest of my life.Sounds weird but yes I love this addiction of mine and I hope it grows for ever.Im addicted to my Husband..yes..Im so addicted to him that I realised how much of an impact it had on me when he was away for 10 days during this US travel.For many it was just a matter of few days but for me each day was a decade to live just to catch him on the webcam chat every night.
I would wake up each day missing his strong arms holding me firmly and every night as I went to bed I would miss falling asleep in his broad shoulders talking about how my day was at work.I missed the way he drove me to work in no time, I missed him ironing my clothes every day,keeping my footware out of the shoe rack.I just missed him fidgeting with the gadgets,I missed everything about him....
For those 10 days when my husband was away, I would console each morning when I made breakfast saying that Sanju doesnt want to eat oats today so I need to make breakfast only for me.When I prepared chapatis for lunch I would soothe myself saying Sanju would eat at work.My husband and I eat together most of the time when we are at home and we share a single glass of water(wink).But during his absence I would say myself that he is held up with some important release at work and hence he is not there with me for dinner.When I prepared milk at night I would tell myself that sanju is too full today to drink milk and hence I need to make only for myself.But the reality of he not being next to me would hit me the most when I would go to sleep around 2.00amish realising the fact that I have been fooling myself all day just to survive through the hard truth of he living miles away from me missing me as much as I do.
I would wait endlessly for 9.30pm IST when he would be online on the webcam , every glimpse of him would bring a tear to my eye and his question would be why are you so dull today..Yes I was extremely dull as I lived like a vegetable though I had so many loving people around me at home.I missed him ..missed him badly..missed him more than during our courtship days...
The day he returned was the most glorious day I had ever lived till then...my man was back with loads of love and goodies for me...Ever since then we have been making up for each nano-second that we missed each other...I really love him..Little did I ever expect that I will be so much so head over heels in love with someone but yes this MAN..my MAN (blink blink) has made it happen my life....
Now he is the Toxic , a lovable toxic that Im addicted to forever...
I would wake up each day missing his strong arms holding me firmly and every night as I went to bed I would miss falling asleep in his broad shoulders talking about how my day was at work.I missed the way he drove me to work in no time, I missed him ironing my clothes every day,keeping my footware out of the shoe rack.I just missed him fidgeting with the gadgets,I missed everything about him....
For those 10 days when my husband was away, I would console each morning when I made breakfast saying that Sanju doesnt want to eat oats today so I need to make breakfast only for me.When I prepared chapatis for lunch I would soothe myself saying Sanju would eat at work.My husband and I eat together most of the time when we are at home and we share a single glass of water(wink).But during his absence I would say myself that he is held up with some important release at work and hence he is not there with me for dinner.When I prepared milk at night I would tell myself that sanju is too full today to drink milk and hence I need to make only for myself.But the reality of he not being next to me would hit me the most when I would go to sleep around 2.00amish realising the fact that I have been fooling myself all day just to survive through the hard truth of he living miles away from me missing me as much as I do.
I would wait endlessly for 9.30pm IST when he would be online on the webcam , every glimpse of him would bring a tear to my eye and his question would be why are you so dull today..Yes I was extremely dull as I lived like a vegetable though I had so many loving people around me at home.I missed him ..missed him badly..missed him more than during our courtship days...
The day he returned was the most glorious day I had ever lived till then...my man was back with loads of love and goodies for me...Ever since then we have been making up for each nano-second that we missed each other...I really love him..Little did I ever expect that I will be so much so head over heels in love with someone but yes this MAN..my MAN (blink blink) has made it happen my life....
Now he is the Toxic , a lovable toxic that Im addicted to forever...
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Mixed Feelings
Feeling weird,happy,sad,hopeful,confused all at the same time.Its time for me to move on from my current employer to another phase of my life.Priorities change as you mature and so does your job.It was around the sametime last year I was wondering if I had made the right decision with my choice of employer but I realise that it was a great place to work for.On the professional front I have definately improved a lot on my domain and technical abilities and on the personal I have gained quite a few friends and my encounter with them is something that Im going to cherish for a very long time.
The hectic sprints,long work hours,working on weekends,healthy arguments with peers,war rooms,planning meetings... all seems be a wonderful experience in my stint here.2010 seems to be offering me new challenges right from the very begining of the year I just hope and pray that Im able to handle every oppoutunity I take with a pinch of salt and handle them successfully.I would be getting back home tomorrow leaving behind my laptop,access card,Id card...
Im going to be a housewife for the next couple of days before I actually step out into another new world waiting to offer me its own good and bad.
The hectic sprints,long work hours,working on weekends,healthy arguments with peers,war rooms,planning meetings... all seems be a wonderful experience in my stint here.2010 seems to be offering me new challenges right from the very begining of the year I just hope and pray that Im able to handle every oppoutunity I take with a pinch of salt and handle them successfully.I would be getting back home tomorrow leaving behind my laptop,access card,Id card...
Im going to be a housewife for the next couple of days before I actually step out into another new world waiting to offer me its own good and bad.
Friday, August 21, 2009
Happiness comes in small packages
Nothing can irritate you more than your husband waking you up saying "Get up...you need to prepare breakfast and lunch,your already late".Well this is how my day begun today!!To add on to it as we drove to work the traffic was a total mess worse than usual.. reached late for my meeting and saw people dispersing from the meeting room while I was panting for breath ..Opened mylaptop and the battery was completely drained out..Finally it boots and boom!! blue screen..I tried the 1st step of troubleshooting "Hard Restart"..it worked..good for me.Feeling extermely thirsty I went to the pantry to fill my water bottle..no water in any of those cans..Informed the admin incharge who advices to me to use the water from the coffee vending machine which is boiling hot.Argh!!!Totally frustrated started my work which added on to my existing irritation with all the last minute changes to be incorporated and no ready to work environments.It was just about the time for me to leave for lunch and I noticed this mail from my husband in my inbox.It was an old mail that he had replied to while we were in courtship.Its basically a questionaire that your dear ones fill it up with details about you...Below is the email and it made my day :)
-----Original Message-----
From: Sivanandam, Sanjeev
Sent: Wednesday, June 20, 2007 11:06 PM
To: 'Subashini D'Subject: RE: reply
BE HONEST
1. My name:
Subashini D
2. Where did we meet?:
We met virtually on shaadi.com and inperson at Panchami :)
3. How long have you known me?:
6 months
4. How well do you know me (a lot, not so much, nothing)?:
A Lot
5. When you first saw me what was your first impression?
She was a cute girl and I wished that you'll accept me.
6. Mi birthday?: [compulsory field] 27th DEC 1982
7. Color Hair?: Black
8. Color eyes?: Black
9. Do you remember the first things I said to you when we first met?
Hi,Hello,blushing,Car Parking and above all remove my glasses
10. What ? s my fav type of music?:
Tamil and English Songs (Hot Ones with nice beats)
11.What ? s one of my fav things to do outdoors?:
Eat and Shop
12. Am I shy or outgoing?
Somewhat shy :)
13. Would you consider me a friend?:
More than that
14. Have you ever seen me cry? If yes, when?:
I havent seen u cry but I knew u cried several times.Your voice said that
15. If there were one good nickname for me, what would it be?
Cutiee
16.I had broccoli stuck on my teeth, would you tell me?
Yes
AM I ??? . ?!?!?!?
17. Quiet or loud?
Loud
18. Short or Tall:
Medium :)
19.Weird or original:
Weird
20. Smart or stupid?
Smart at times silly and stupid many a time
21. Boring or Fun?
Fun
22. Attractive or Unattractive?
Attractive
DO YOU THINK I'M... (yes or no, if u wanna say something extra say it)
23.A psycho?
NO
24.Athlethic?
NO
25. A nerd?
NO
26. Two-faced?
NO
27.Immature?
YES
28. Mature?
NO still to learn a lot
JUST A FEW MORE QUESTIONS
29. What is the worst thing about me?
Your possessiveness and silliness
30. When is my birthday?
Answered in Q6
31. Who is my best friend?
Santosh - in boys Rajini/Arthi/Priya/Praneta/Shamita/Jayshree ( I don't think u have one best friend as such) these girls are all ur good friends
32. What song(if any)reminds you of me?
DDLJ - Meri Kabo Mein too Aya
33. Do I remind you of any characters on TV?
Not really
34. If you could rename me, what would my name be?
Anjali S
35. A feature that you like about me as a person:
Your cute round chubby face and ur smile
36. If you could give me anything, what would it be?
My Happiness
37. If you could describe me in one word, what would it be?
Awesome
38. What word do I say all the time?
PODA
39. Is there anything you ? d like to say to me?
I Love u and Thanks for being a part of my life.
-----Original Message-----
From: Sivanandam, Sanjeev
Sent: Wednesday, June 20, 2007 11:06 PM
To: 'Subashini D'Subject: RE: reply
BE HONEST
1. My name:
Subashini D
2. Where did we meet?:
We met virtually on shaadi.com and inperson at Panchami :)
3. How long have you known me?:
6 months
4. How well do you know me (a lot, not so much, nothing)?:
A Lot
5. When you first saw me what was your first impression?
She was a cute girl and I wished that you'll accept me.
6. Mi birthday?: [compulsory field] 27th DEC 1982
7. Color Hair?: Black
8. Color eyes?: Black
9. Do you remember the first things I said to you when we first met?
Hi,Hello,blushing,Car Parking and above all remove my glasses
10. What ? s my fav type of music?:
Tamil and English Songs (Hot Ones with nice beats)
11.What ? s one of my fav things to do outdoors?:
Eat and Shop
12. Am I shy or outgoing?
Somewhat shy :)
13. Would you consider me a friend?:
More than that
14. Have you ever seen me cry? If yes, when?:
I havent seen u cry but I knew u cried several times.Your voice said that
15. If there were one good nickname for me, what would it be?
Cutiee
16.I had broccoli stuck on my teeth, would you tell me?
Yes
AM I ??? . ?!?!?!?
17. Quiet or loud?
Loud
18. Short or Tall:
Medium :)
19.Weird or original:
Weird
20. Smart or stupid?
Smart at times silly and stupid many a time
21. Boring or Fun?
Fun
22. Attractive or Unattractive?
Attractive
DO YOU THINK I'M... (yes or no, if u wanna say something extra say it)
23.A psycho?
NO
24.Athlethic?
NO
25. A nerd?
NO
26. Two-faced?
NO
27.Immature?
YES
28. Mature?
NO still to learn a lot
JUST A FEW MORE QUESTIONS
29. What is the worst thing about me?
Your possessiveness and silliness
30. When is my birthday?
Answered in Q6
31. Who is my best friend?
Santosh - in boys Rajini/Arthi/Priya/Praneta/Shamita/Jayshree ( I don't think u have one best friend as such) these girls are all ur good friends
32. What song(if any)reminds you of me?
DDLJ - Meri Kabo Mein too Aya
33. Do I remind you of any characters on TV?
Not really
34. If you could rename me, what would my name be?
Anjali S
35. A feature that you like about me as a person:
Your cute round chubby face and ur smile
36. If you could give me anything, what would it be?
My Happiness
37. If you could describe me in one word, what would it be?
Awesome
38. What word do I say all the time?
PODA
39. Is there anything you ? d like to say to me?
I Love u and Thanks for being a part of my life.
Monday, August 10, 2009
Random Thoughts that run across you!!
There are people who talk to you with sugar coated words ...they make you feel like your the best in whatever you do..but at the same time they are capable enough to switch gears and talk ill about you behind your back.I dont know if its for the same reason or what but I have learnt to be immune to compliments over a period of time. I really dont have to do things to impress someone or to prove my standards. I know what I am capable of and also of my shortcomings,Im happy with the way I am and I really dont need false praises to get work done out of me.
Sometimes you really dont know whats running on your mind but your so stressed out that you just pen down some random thoughts running in your mind.To be frank Im really exhausted...I have no words to explain how tired every cell in my body feels.The physical strain on me seems to be much more than the mental one. I think I need a break ,I need a day all for myself where I do nothing but just sleep or pamper myself.
The more you work the more is offloaded to you...and there is absolute no consideration or a waiver whatsoever for multitasking in trying to achieve a satiable amount of worklife balance.Another challenge is to deal with the stereotypes.They are so reluctant to change that they develop a sense of insecurity to adapt.My theory is simple,if you expect me to something let me do it in my way,dont expect me to change to your comfort.If you want me to change Im not in game,please do it your way and I have no qualms about it.
Btw Im extermely hungry now and have nothing to eat :(
Sometimes you really dont know whats running on your mind but your so stressed out that you just pen down some random thoughts running in your mind.To be frank Im really exhausted...I have no words to explain how tired every cell in my body feels.The physical strain on me seems to be much more than the mental one. I think I need a break ,I need a day all for myself where I do nothing but just sleep or pamper myself.
The more you work the more is offloaded to you...and there is absolute no consideration or a waiver whatsoever for multitasking in trying to achieve a satiable amount of worklife balance.Another challenge is to deal with the stereotypes.They are so reluctant to change that they develop a sense of insecurity to adapt.My theory is simple,if you expect me to something let me do it in my way,dont expect me to change to your comfort.If you want me to change Im not in game,please do it your way and I have no qualms about it.
Btw Im extermely hungry now and have nothing to eat :(
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Jab We All Met
I was walking back to my building after lunch and for some reason I was recollected about this most beautiful moment of my life...the 1st time San,his parents and relatives had come home to see me..I still remember the day like it happend just a few hours ago..San's mom called us & informed that they would come over to our place around 6pm,it was a Sunday evening a very beautiful evening..my most memorable one that I cherish till date..Usually the prospective grooms intentionally do not arrive on time just to build up their price & I hated it...I hated it more because my dad always insisted I drape a saree,put flowers and wear some gold jewels..so I had to put up an act of what Im actually not till the prospective groom and his folks left & now I had to stay in this attire and wait for them ...There were times when we would actually give up while the groom's parents would call up with a silly explaination about the bad traffic or not being able to locate our house...Admist such grooms ,San being called as the walking clock called up our home at 5.50pm at a location that will would take less than 10 mintutes to reach our home asking us to guide them the way to our home.My brother instantly reached the place in no time & gained all the attention and the good name by his humble ,friendly and emphathatic attitude.He managed to impress everyone in San's family including San accumulating pressure on me to be all the more the so called "good girl"..yeah right me and good :p contact San for more details....Anyways San and his family stepped into our house when the clock struck 6pm & I could actually see San's deep sense of satisfaction for having lived up to the name of being called a walking clock. While my parents greeted them ,a self introduction session had started while I had all the butterflies in the world flying inside my stomach.San was not the 1st first groom had I seen..I have seen several weird ones and smart ones too ;) hehe but still you when its the special one its always a little bit of overreaction and exaggeration...While I was in the kitchen nibbling on some snacks that was kept to be served for San and his family I was also listening to what they were talking..There were a lot of loud trumphets being blown about San in Dolby Stereo effect & I was like "Oh really..."Finally came the time when my dad said "Subha come" and I hoped I was deaf for a moment not to hear it or blind so that I dont see the way they stare at me from head to toe.Since San & I had already met near my office a few days ago I was saved from being in a saree or flowers or the extra jewels since I had told my dad that San does like such show off and he wants me appear like the way I am..and for once my dad heeded.I had no clue how I managed to walk from the kitchen to the hall all I remember was San was sitting at a position which was facing the kitchen door & he got to see me first & he pretended like he was seeing me for the first time..I remember my bro giggling as I sat with a huge thud on the sofa next to my mother-in-law and smiled at all.I realised that I forgot to say "Namaste" which I had rehearsed n times all day .So while everyones eyes were stuck on me with their smiles I abruptly said "Namaste" and gave a funny giggle at my brother who was laughing at me with his mute button on.Then started my FIL with his regular questions about schooling,college,engineering,blah blue...while the ladies were busy observing me from every angle I saw my San with a cheeky look listening to me talk ..What surprised me the most was once my FIL stopped firing questions at me, San started like as if he knew nothing about me..I said to myself..Gosh your such a good actor...I was like yeah right and answered his questions like I was answering them for the 1st time & patted myself saying "Im also a good actor". As my dad took a tour of everyone around the house San decided to sit and talk to me..this was when he was my San..took a hop skip and jump and landed sitting right next to me with his eyes at the duplex part of my house to ensure no on was peeping at us...Finally I had to literally push him to take a tour of the house along with others which he did reluctantly...Finally as they left San turned around saying "Bye Subashini" with a sweet glint in his eyes..thats it I knew he was my man for now and forever....
Sometimes my MIL and I talk about this day and she says what she liked about me the most was that I kept smiling throughout even though I was nervous...and what I liked the most about my MIL was she never asked me any questions but kept smiling not then nor now....
Sometimes my MIL and I talk about this day and she says what she liked about me the most was that I kept smiling throughout even though I was nervous...and what I liked the most about my MIL was she never asked me any questions but kept smiling not then nor now....
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